Hi Folks,
It's been a super busy day today, so here an old post of mine from several years ago. I re-read it every so often just to remind myself of how it's done. Hope you enjoy.
Using
Language Powerfully
I
have come to understand that the only thing you can carry with you
from this realm of existence to the next is the quality of the
relationships you have developed and nurtured in this one. This is
the focus of my life and the lens through which I see my world.
I
know, I promised to help develop a positive life focus. Well,
building loving, supportive relationships is a very positive thing in
my book; keeping this in mind at all times will help you stay
focused. The purpose here is to build that new and beautiful life we
all want; this is one of the ways we go about it.
We
all want to feel good; that is our prime motivation. Just as all
things are made of a single substance (energy), all actions are
motivated by a single desire, (the desire to feel good). Sorry folks,
but if you look deep enough inside, and be honest with yourself, you
will find that it is true. It is not a bad thing; it just is what it
is. Knowing this, is the key to building those loving, supportive
relationships. It is also the key to having a lot fewer bad days
yourself.
Realizing
what truly motivates folks, you can short circuit your own emotional
responses to many situations. For example, an angry person who is
shouting at you in traffic is not feeling good, and their anger is
merely their way of trying to change that. If you become defensive
and meet angry energy with angry energy, you both end up feeling bad.
A better response would be to smile and say, “Gee, that poor soul
is having a really bad day. I am so very lucky he didn’t actually
smack into me.” Now you have used language and understanding
powerfully to preserve your good feelings. That angry energy has
failed to ruin your day.
Now,
let’s take that to a face to face. An angry person is offended by
something you have said, or was reported to have said. Returning
anger for anger is a negative response; we want a positive response
that leaves us feeling good. Better still we want a response that
will make our angry friend feel good as well. Instead of, “Back off
Jack, get out of my face!” you might try, “Obviously I chose my
words poorly and offended you; I apologize; hurting you was not my
intention.” Now the situation is diffused and you have a point from
which you can build a better relationship with this person.
Also,
the subconscious mind rarely actually hears the first word or two of
a sentence. Eg. “Don’t forget to take out the garbage.” becomes
“Forget to take out the garbage.” With a quick switch to positive
use of language we get, “Remember to take out the garbage.” which
becomes, “Take out the garbage.” See? It’s still the same
message.
I
hope that these examples will demonstrate how positive use of
language can improve your own sense of well-being, and also help you
build stronger, more loving, and supportive relationships, as well as
help you have your needs met more fully.
It
has been said that an evil thought first becomes an evil intent, then
an evil word, and then an evil action. The other side of the coin is
also true. A loving thought becomes a loving intent, then a loving
word, and then a loving action. We think in language. By changing the
way we use language we change our very thought processes, our
habitual speech patterns, and the way we actually live and experience
life.
Ok, it is time to have some fun here. Get a small
notebook and keep it with you; you’re going to be keeping score.
The object of the game is to make as many people smile as you can
each and every day. They are worth five points each. After you reach
five hundred points you can dispense with the notebook.
Some
hints: Don’t just drop a tip on the table and run out of the
restaurant, stop the waiter and thank him for the stellar service. If
you like the sweater a woman is wearing, tell her so. Make brief eye
contact with others as you pass on the street and smile; chances are
they will smile in return. Instead of complaining of bad service, try
complimenting folks when they give you good service. All this will
make you feel better too, as well as help you build stronger
relationships.
Remember,
what we are doing here is using powerful language powerfully. Now go
forth and make a new and brighter life for yourself and others.
So, what do you think? Do you agree
with what I have said? Disagree? Is there another subject you’d
like to discuss? Drop me a line and let me know. Remember, I’m old
and have a wealth of advice I’m all too willing to share.
ROW80 check in.
I did not reach my goal of 10K words, but I came close at 8K+. So, expecting a busy week next week I will shoot for another 10K or the end of the first draft, whichever comes first. Wish me luck. :)
Drop me a line and say hello.
Bless
Pru
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